Sunday, August 26, 2007
One year ago today, I was settling into a hotel room in Boston anxiously awaiting my first day of work at Bridgespan. It feels like its been longer than that.
I remember worrying about whether I could cut it as a consultant. Whether I'd be smart enough, likable enough, and of course, whether I'd wear the right shoes. I wondered if Bridgespan was the right job for me and whether I was right for it.
A year has passed and I realize that I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it - people like me! I feel like the consultant position at Bridgespan fits me like a glove and I believe I'm a valuable member of the team. And I KNOW I'm wearing the right shoes.
Despite my love for the job, the commitment to the causes we serve, and the pure adoration for the people I work with, this year has not been without its challenges. Consulting and its lingo and frameworks is not a natural state of being. I'm still learning a lot - which is great. But I still worry that I may not be learning fast enough or that my approach to the work might not be "consulting-ey" enough. I guess no matter where you are or what you do, life isn't without its anxieties.
In addition to the case in early learning, I just got staffed to an education case. We're working with a charter management organization (CMO). Bridgespan does a lot of education work, but this is my first foray into the K-12 world. My work stream (which just means the part of the case I'm working on) includes looking at school performance data. It was shocking to me to learn how poorly schools all over the country were doing. Don't get me wrong - I knew schools were bad but I had no CLUE how few kids graduate or can pass a standardized math test or have a chance of getting a college education. The stats are incredibly scary. And I also wonder about the data we collect on kids. The data I've been looking at is all about test scores - but is that the point of school really? It reminds me of the grade non-disclosure debate at Wharton (whatever happened with that - it's funny how something you care passionately about can fade from view over time... out of sight out of mind I guess). Are those who do the best on tests the ones who received the best and most fulfilling education?
But like I said - I'm completely new to the ed space. Who knows? Maybe what I learn over the coming months will make me a believer in the proof that tests matters most. Maybe I shouldn't say this, but I hope not.
I remember worrying about whether I could cut it as a consultant. Whether I'd be smart enough, likable enough, and of course, whether I'd wear the right shoes. I wondered if Bridgespan was the right job for me and whether I was right for it.
A year has passed and I realize that I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it - people like me! I feel like the consultant position at Bridgespan fits me like a glove and I believe I'm a valuable member of the team. And I KNOW I'm wearing the right shoes.
Despite my love for the job, the commitment to the causes we serve, and the pure adoration for the people I work with, this year has not been without its challenges. Consulting and its lingo and frameworks is not a natural state of being. I'm still learning a lot - which is great. But I still worry that I may not be learning fast enough or that my approach to the work might not be "consulting-ey" enough. I guess no matter where you are or what you do, life isn't without its anxieties.
In addition to the case in early learning, I just got staffed to an education case. We're working with a charter management organization (CMO). Bridgespan does a lot of education work, but this is my first foray into the K-12 world. My work stream (which just means the part of the case I'm working on) includes looking at school performance data. It was shocking to me to learn how poorly schools all over the country were doing. Don't get me wrong - I knew schools were bad but I had no CLUE how few kids graduate or can pass a standardized math test or have a chance of getting a college education. The stats are incredibly scary. And I also wonder about the data we collect on kids. The data I've been looking at is all about test scores - but is that the point of school really? It reminds me of the grade non-disclosure debate at Wharton (whatever happened with that - it's funny how something you care passionately about can fade from view over time... out of sight out of mind I guess). Are those who do the best on tests the ones who received the best and most fulfilling education?
But like I said - I'm completely new to the ed space. Who knows? Maybe what I learn over the coming months will make me a believer in the proof that tests matters most. Maybe I shouldn't say this, but I hope not.
Labels: One Year Later
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Super long time - no post.
Things have been hectic at work and my refusal to get more than wireless card (that doesn't work in my apartment ) for internet has squashed my ability to blog to nearly non-existence.
I still love my job - I moved on to a new case in early learning. We're working with a nonprofit that's focused on making sure children from birth to five have the right opportunities to be successful in school and in life. What's really cool about this organization is how they approach early learning. It's not just about childcare and preschool. They recognize that MANY different factors affect a child's ability to succeed in school: their parents, the community they live in, the other adults they interact with regularly, their physical conditions of the environments they are in, etc. etc. What's really exciting about this view, is how they are working to change how people think about early child development - which I believe is critical to being able to change early learning experiences and getting more kids school ready.
I'm still in love with the Bay area - I can hardly believe that exactly one year ago I moved out here to my new home. I have to say, San Fran's weather has finally reared it's weird head. I never thought I'd say this but I miss hot and humid summers. There's something to be said for having a sticky night where you throw open the window and turn on the fan full blast and HOPE that the stickiness will subside enough to allow sleep. But something tells me if I were in a hot sticky summer I'd remember why it sucks. Funny - I don't miss the snow that way.
I am ready to move into the city though. I live in the suburbs - and despite my insistence that the commute doesn't bother me, I have to say, the commute ABSOLUTELY sucks. Especially late at night when I'm hanging out. It sucks to leave dinner at 10p knowing that I won't cross my threshold until 11p. I need to rectify that - I don't know what I was thinking. No I take that back - I liked my neighborhood - it was sanitized and safe and full of shopping. But I need to live in the city. I'm a single girl! I guess I didn't think about that when I moved a year ago. Oh well. Hopefully, this time next year I'll be in a smaller apartment that I pay out the nose for. Hey - at least I'll be in the city!
I'm not sure if I'll continue blogging. Firstly, I started this blog to talk about my anxieties about the business school application process and then my anxieties about school itself. Now don't get me wrong, I have plenty of anxieties about work. Last week for example was a particularly hard week for me. But there's something about the lack of anonymity that keeps me from blogging about that. And I don't want to blog about clients so...
And that's a nice segue to my second thought - "the seal" has been broken. People at work have discovered the blog. And they sometimes bring it up in conversation. I don't know why it weirds me out to have people at work reading the blog. People at Wharton read my stuff all the time and often commented on what I posted. But this feels different. It feels like two worlds are colliding. I feel like George Costanza ("If Relationship George walks through that door, he will kill Independent George! A George divided against itself, cannot stand!") Well not that extreme but you get the picture.
So this may be one of my last posts. Unless I can find a way to write about stuff going on in my life (and let's face it the majority of that is stuff at work) without feeling like I'm violating other people's privacy or client confidentiality or (most importantly) "the seal." We'll see.
Things have been hectic at work and my refusal to get more than wireless card (that doesn't work in my apartment ) for internet has squashed my ability to blog to nearly non-existence.
I still love my job - I moved on to a new case in early learning. We're working with a nonprofit that's focused on making sure children from birth to five have the right opportunities to be successful in school and in life. What's really cool about this organization is how they approach early learning. It's not just about childcare and preschool. They recognize that MANY different factors affect a child's ability to succeed in school: their parents, the community they live in, the other adults they interact with regularly, their physical conditions of the environments they are in, etc. etc. What's really exciting about this view, is how they are working to change how people think about early child development - which I believe is critical to being able to change early learning experiences and getting more kids school ready.
I'm still in love with the Bay area - I can hardly believe that exactly one year ago I moved out here to my new home. I have to say, San Fran's weather has finally reared it's weird head. I never thought I'd say this but I miss hot and humid summers. There's something to be said for having a sticky night where you throw open the window and turn on the fan full blast and HOPE that the stickiness will subside enough to allow sleep. But something tells me if I were in a hot sticky summer I'd remember why it sucks. Funny - I don't miss the snow that way.
I am ready to move into the city though. I live in the suburbs - and despite my insistence that the commute doesn't bother me, I have to say, the commute ABSOLUTELY sucks. Especially late at night when I'm hanging out. It sucks to leave dinner at 10p knowing that I won't cross my threshold until 11p. I need to rectify that - I don't know what I was thinking. No I take that back - I liked my neighborhood - it was sanitized and safe and full of shopping. But I need to live in the city. I'm a single girl! I guess I didn't think about that when I moved a year ago. Oh well. Hopefully, this time next year I'll be in a smaller apartment that I pay out the nose for. Hey - at least I'll be in the city!
I'm not sure if I'll continue blogging. Firstly, I started this blog to talk about my anxieties about the business school application process and then my anxieties about school itself. Now don't get me wrong, I have plenty of anxieties about work. Last week for example was a particularly hard week for me. But there's something about the lack of anonymity that keeps me from blogging about that. And I don't want to blog about clients so...
And that's a nice segue to my second thought - "the seal" has been broken. People at work have discovered the blog. And they sometimes bring it up in conversation. I don't know why it weirds me out to have people at work reading the blog. People at Wharton read my stuff all the time and often commented on what I posted. But this feels different. It feels like two worlds are colliding. I feel like George Costanza ("If Relationship George walks through that door, he will kill Independent George! A George divided against itself, cannot stand!") Well not that extreme but you get the picture.
So this may be one of my last posts. Unless I can find a way to write about stuff going on in my life (and let's face it the majority of that is stuff at work) without feeling like I'm violating other people's privacy or client confidentiality or (most importantly) "the seal." We'll see.
Labels: And they could never tear us apart...
Sunday, March 11, 2007
They say March rolls in like a lion and out like a lamb. Usually they're talking about the weather. Given the mild weather we're having in Norcal this winter, the statement doesn't seem to hold true. It DOES hold true, however, for my work life right now. Work has been a bit hectic. The last two weeks were my busiest since starting at Bridgespan 6 months ago.
I can't believe its been 6 months. Time flies. I've learned so much in the last 1/2 year. It's amazing to look at something as simple as slides to see my progress. My first deck (consultantese for powerpoint presentation) was abysmal. Embarrassing even. Now when I look at my slides, they look like other people's slides. They look like they belong in a Bridgespan deck. May seem simple - but it was definitely I had to make an effort to learn. I'm starting to feel more confident. Not because I know everything - far from it. I feel more confident because I'm starting to realize that I can learn how to be a good consultant. And I'm lucky to work at a firm that's so supportive in helping me learn how to BE a good consultant.
This week, I'm attending Bain's New Consultant Training (NCT) in Miami. NCT is an opportunity to take a step back an review some of the frameworks we learned in pre-NCT when we first started. What's great about revisiting these topics 6 months later is now I actually know what a consultant does, so it makes more sense now. It's also great to head to NCT because it's training for 25% of the Bain new consulting class from around the globe. So that means there's lots of Whartonites. It's great to run into people I haven't seen since May and catch up. Everyone looks happy - and more well rested. And it's just nice to reconnect with people with whom you shared this amazing experience. It should be a good week.
I can't believe its been 6 months. Time flies. I've learned so much in the last 1/2 year. It's amazing to look at something as simple as slides to see my progress. My first deck (consultantese for powerpoint presentation) was abysmal. Embarrassing even. Now when I look at my slides, they look like other people's slides. They look like they belong in a Bridgespan deck. May seem simple - but it was definitely I had to make an effort to learn. I'm starting to feel more confident. Not because I know everything - far from it. I feel more confident because I'm starting to realize that I can learn how to be a good consultant. And I'm lucky to work at a firm that's so supportive in helping me learn how to BE a good consultant.
This week, I'm attending Bain's New Consultant Training (NCT) in Miami. NCT is an opportunity to take a step back an review some of the frameworks we learned in pre-NCT when we first started. What's great about revisiting these topics 6 months later is now I actually know what a consultant does, so it makes more sense now. It's also great to head to NCT because it's training for 25% of the Bain new consulting class from around the globe. So that means there's lots of Whartonites. It's great to run into people I haven't seen since May and catch up. Everyone looks happy - and more well rested. And it's just nice to reconnect with people with whom you shared this amazing experience. It should be a good week.
Labels: Becoming a Consultant
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Happy new year!! Well belated happy new year, anyway. Long time, no blog.
The past month and a half have been kind of crazy. With travel and a case that's going warp speed, things have been kind of hectic. This past weekend was my birthday. The day was pretty chill. I went out with friends which was fun. I got a lot of calls, emails, and text messages which gave me the warm fuzzies. Talking to friends and family is actually the best present ever.
Work is going well. I can't believe I've been here 5 months. It's kind of flown by. I'm still 100% staffed on my case. Bridgespan (and many other consulting firms) uses a 50-50% staffing model. That means that you're often staffed on two cases. At Bridgespan our training model eases new consultants into 50-50% staffing. The case I'm on is a bit of a beast so I'm still 100%. The prospect of being on two cases is kind of scary, so I'm glad to still just be on one case.
Tonight I'm in LA. I just missed the crazy winter weather they had here last week - now things are serene and characteristically sunny. I'm getting to work more with the client, which is cool. I'm also working more on the content of the strategy (before I was working mainly on org stuff), which is REALLY cool. It's so interesting to talk about strategies and approaches that can transform peoples lives. Our client is working with some of the most vulnerable and marginalized segments of our society. They approach systems change holistically, which is unique and an extremely powerful way to approach this work. It's fulfilling to get to work on these issues.
The past month and a half have been kind of crazy. With travel and a case that's going warp speed, things have been kind of hectic. This past weekend was my birthday. The day was pretty chill. I went out with friends which was fun. I got a lot of calls, emails, and text messages which gave me the warm fuzzies. Talking to friends and family is actually the best present ever.
Work is going well. I can't believe I've been here 5 months. It's kind of flown by. I'm still 100% staffed on my case. Bridgespan (and many other consulting firms) uses a 50-50% staffing model. That means that you're often staffed on two cases. At Bridgespan our training model eases new consultants into 50-50% staffing. The case I'm on is a bit of a beast so I'm still 100%. The prospect of being on two cases is kind of scary, so I'm glad to still just be on one case.
Tonight I'm in LA. I just missed the crazy winter weather they had here last week - now things are serene and characteristically sunny. I'm getting to work more with the client, which is cool. I'm also working more on the content of the strategy (before I was working mainly on org stuff), which is REALLY cool. It's so interesting to talk about strategies and approaches that can transform peoples lives. Our client is working with some of the most vulnerable and marginalized segments of our society. They approach systems change holistically, which is unique and an extremely powerful way to approach this work. It's fulfilling to get to work on these issues.
Labels: Warm Fuzzies
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Today as I was walking to the BART station, a familiar sight passed in front of me. An old Philadelphia street trolley was running along Market St. in San Francisco. When I saw the trolley with the word "PHILA" plastered on it, this wide grin spread across my face. I never thought I'd be so happy to see something familiar from Philly. I guess absence really does make the heart grow fonder.
This week I'm actually headed back to my former home for the Whitney M Young Jr. Conference. It'll be my second trip back since moving away. Last month I went back for a recruiting event. It was weird to be a visitor in a place I called home so many years. I know Philly like the back of my hand, so it was odd to be in a cab for once and know whether or not the cabbie was trying to take the long, stupid way to my destination. I'm still in near constant state of being lost in San Francisco - I hardly ever know when the cabbie is going the wrong way. Although the other day, I was VERY proud to be able to tell the cabbie he was going the wrong way. And on another day I was actually able to direct a tourist - sure it was only one block away, but hey, it's something.
The trip this week will feel exceptionally weird because I'll be manning a career fair booth. Being on the other side of the recruiting table is SOOO weird. People act so nervous around me, and sometimes avoid returning my phone calls and emails. I think I'm pretty approachable, so it's hard to process these reactions. And it can also be frustrating when you see people drop the ball. As a student, sometimes all it takes to make the interview list is reaching out and connecting with people at the firm you're interested in - when you don't do this it makes it hard for people to advocate for you. I remember how much I hated doing this stuff when I was at Wharton - but I still did it. It's sad to see people avoid doing it. It's like watching people shoot themselves in the foot.
So this week will feel weird. Weird to be in Philly. Weird to have people nervous around me. What I am excited about is seeing some of my old classmates. WMY is a homecoming of sorts for a lot of AAMBAA alums. It'll be great to catch up with people and hang out.
This week I'm actually headed back to my former home for the Whitney M Young Jr. Conference. It'll be my second trip back since moving away. Last month I went back for a recruiting event. It was weird to be a visitor in a place I called home so many years. I know Philly like the back of my hand, so it was odd to be in a cab for once and know whether or not the cabbie was trying to take the long, stupid way to my destination. I'm still in near constant state of being lost in San Francisco - I hardly ever know when the cabbie is going the wrong way. Although the other day, I was VERY proud to be able to tell the cabbie he was going the wrong way. And on another day I was actually able to direct a tourist - sure it was only one block away, but hey, it's something.
The trip this week will feel exceptionally weird because I'll be manning a career fair booth. Being on the other side of the recruiting table is SOOO weird. People act so nervous around me, and sometimes avoid returning my phone calls and emails. I think I'm pretty approachable, so it's hard to process these reactions. And it can also be frustrating when you see people drop the ball. As a student, sometimes all it takes to make the interview list is reaching out and connecting with people at the firm you're interested in - when you don't do this it makes it hard for people to advocate for you. I remember how much I hated doing this stuff when I was at Wharton - but I still did it. It's sad to see people avoid doing it. It's like watching people shoot themselves in the foot.
So this week will feel weird. Weird to be in Philly. Weird to have people nervous around me. What I am excited about is seeing some of my old classmates. WMY is a homecoming of sorts for a lot of AAMBAA alums. It'll be great to catch up with people and hang out.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Life is good.
For the last 6 years or so, I wake up after election day pissed off and totally avoiding the news. This past Wednesday was a different experience - one I've missed. I've definitely had a bit of a spring in my step this week.
Work continues to be pretty cool, although the honeymoon period is over with the client. It's interesting to see how the team manages the client relationship and how they think about who needs to be looped in to ensure buy-in of our ideas. I'm also becoming more independent in my work. Although whenever I'm feeling super confident about my ability to do my job, something will happen to make me feel like an absolute idiot. Like earlier this week, I volunteered to do extra work. Good right? Well I just didn't get the assignment. And it felt like everyone else in the room did. Who ever made up the phrase that "there's no such thing as a dumb question" was a big ole liar, and this week, I was living proof of that. What truly sucks is I had my moment of dumbness in front of a partner. Great. Now he probably thinks I'm an idiot. Hopefully I'll be able to redeem myself.
Things are picking up socially, and I find myself totally falling in love with San Francisco. This city is wonderful - in some ways it reminds me of New York. Lots of activity at night, and a bit gritty. I love walking down the street and seeing some random group making music or dancing or whatever. But the people are so much nicer here. I really love it.
And I've committed myself to not saying no to hanging out with folks. Because I live in the suburbs, its really easy to come up with excuses to not hang out with people in the city. I've decided, I'm not doing that. So yes, it means I have to drive into the city, find parking and the like. But I think it's worth it.
I'd still like to volunteer or do some other activity, but I'm glad that my social calendar is beginning to fill.
Slowly but surely, I'm beginning to make the Bay area my new home.
For the last 6 years or so, I wake up after election day pissed off and totally avoiding the news. This past Wednesday was a different experience - one I've missed. I've definitely had a bit of a spring in my step this week.
Work continues to be pretty cool, although the honeymoon period is over with the client. It's interesting to see how the team manages the client relationship and how they think about who needs to be looped in to ensure buy-in of our ideas. I'm also becoming more independent in my work. Although whenever I'm feeling super confident about my ability to do my job, something will happen to make me feel like an absolute idiot. Like earlier this week, I volunteered to do extra work. Good right? Well I just didn't get the assignment. And it felt like everyone else in the room did. Who ever made up the phrase that "there's no such thing as a dumb question" was a big ole liar, and this week, I was living proof of that. What truly sucks is I had my moment of dumbness in front of a partner. Great. Now he probably thinks I'm an idiot. Hopefully I'll be able to redeem myself.
Things are picking up socially, and I find myself totally falling in love with San Francisco. This city is wonderful - in some ways it reminds me of New York. Lots of activity at night, and a bit gritty. I love walking down the street and seeing some random group making music or dancing or whatever. But the people are so much nicer here. I really love it.
And I've committed myself to not saying no to hanging out with folks. Because I live in the suburbs, its really easy to come up with excuses to not hang out with people in the city. I've decided, I'm not doing that. So yes, it means I have to drive into the city, find parking and the like. But I think it's worth it.
I'd still like to volunteer or do some other activity, but I'm glad that my social calendar is beginning to fill.
Slowly but surely, I'm beginning to make the Bay area my new home.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
It's been a while.
Work has been wonderful. The piece of the case I'm working on centers on organizational behavior issues. During undergrad and Wharton I took quite a few classes on this stuff because it interests me. It's kinda cool to actually use the stuff I've learned. It's been kind of surprising actually, the classes that are relevant to nonprofit consulting. I quoted one of my OPIM professors the other day. If you told me last year that I'd quote my OPIM professor, I'd tell you it was time to lay down the crack pipe. But even operations is relevant. (The quote you ask? "When you look at a process that's broken, ask yourself what's changed to get to the root cause of the problem.")
Beyond the organizational issues, I get to think about systemic change. One of the big theories in the nonprofit sector is that societal systems (economic, political, social, health, etc.) are broken. Nonprofits work to correct these broken systems through the use of various subsidies (lower staff salaries, direct funding, training, patient capital, etc.) and through efforts to change the system. We're working with our client to help them think about their "Theory of Change" - what the believe about the current system and what they believe will change it. It's really cool to contribute to that kind of thinking. Hell, it's really cool to be asked to think period.
Not only is the work interesting, but I truly enjoy being around my co-workers. They're smart, funny, compassionate, and not afraid of being a little bit nerdy. I admire them a great deal, and I'm grateful to be given the opportunity to work with them.
But all is not sunshine and light - I'm still trying to figure out how to rediscover that other part of me. I feel like I go to work, come home, sleep, repeat. I need something else. I just don't know what I would do or when I would do it. The great thing about Wharton is that you just have to show up, add water, and stir and POOF - there you have it. Instant friends and other activities. It's a little bit more difficult this time around. I just feel incomplete. And sometimes a bit lonely. Most of my friends are on the east coast. With the 3-hour time difference, it's really hard to connect with people. And living in the suburbs has exacerbated that situation at times. Now that I'm settled into the Bay area, I'm starting to look into some of the San Francisco neighborhoods as possible places to settle. Noe Valley and Potrero Hill have piqued my interest. So despite my aversion to moving I may move to the city once my lease is up. Something tells me living closer may help create more opportunities to be involved in SOMETHING.
Work has been wonderful. The piece of the case I'm working on centers on organizational behavior issues. During undergrad and Wharton I took quite a few classes on this stuff because it interests me. It's kinda cool to actually use the stuff I've learned. It's been kind of surprising actually, the classes that are relevant to nonprofit consulting. I quoted one of my OPIM professors the other day. If you told me last year that I'd quote my OPIM professor, I'd tell you it was time to lay down the crack pipe. But even operations is relevant. (The quote you ask? "When you look at a process that's broken, ask yourself what's changed to get to the root cause of the problem.")
Beyond the organizational issues, I get to think about systemic change. One of the big theories in the nonprofit sector is that societal systems (economic, political, social, health, etc.) are broken. Nonprofits work to correct these broken systems through the use of various subsidies (lower staff salaries, direct funding, training, patient capital, etc.) and through efforts to change the system. We're working with our client to help them think about their "Theory of Change" - what the believe about the current system and what they believe will change it. It's really cool to contribute to that kind of thinking. Hell, it's really cool to be asked to think period.
Not only is the work interesting, but I truly enjoy being around my co-workers. They're smart, funny, compassionate, and not afraid of being a little bit nerdy. I admire them a great deal, and I'm grateful to be given the opportunity to work with them.
But all is not sunshine and light - I'm still trying to figure out how to rediscover that other part of me. I feel like I go to work, come home, sleep, repeat. I need something else. I just don't know what I would do or when I would do it. The great thing about Wharton is that you just have to show up, add water, and stir and POOF - there you have it. Instant friends and other activities. It's a little bit more difficult this time around. I just feel incomplete. And sometimes a bit lonely. Most of my friends are on the east coast. With the 3-hour time difference, it's really hard to connect with people. And living in the suburbs has exacerbated that situation at times. Now that I'm settled into the Bay area, I'm starting to look into some of the San Francisco neighborhoods as possible places to settle. Noe Valley and Potrero Hill have piqued my interest. So despite my aversion to moving I may move to the city once my lease is up. Something tells me living closer may help create more opportunities to be involved in SOMETHING.
